How to Measure Feedback: It’s Not What You Say, But How They Hear It

The ‘Gauge’ Principle in Radical Candor

Have you ever given feedback you thought was well-received, only to find out later it had a completely different impact than you intended?

This is where the art of gauging feedback comes in. As Kim Scott, author of and co-founder of Radical Candor, puts it, “Radical Candor gets measured, not at the speaker’s mouth, but at the listener’s ear.”

Gauging feedback involves paying close attention to the recipient’s reactions and adjusting your communication style accordingly. It’s about recognizing that feedback is not a one-size-fits-all formula; what works for one person may not work for another.

Why Is Gauging Feedback So Important?

• Ensuring clarity: It helps ensure that your feedback is being heard and understood as intended.
• Building trust: It shows that you care about the other person’s perspective and are willing to adjust your communication style to meet their needs.
• Improving relationships: It can help strengthen relationships by fostering open and honest communication.

Tips for Effective Feedback Delivery

1. Solicit feedback on your feedback: After delivering feedback, check in with the recipient and ask for their thoughts on how it was received. Questions like, “How did that land for you?” or “How could I have been more clear?” can open up a dialogue and give you a better understanding of their perspective.
2. Minimize misunderstandings: Ensure your feedback is kind, clear, specific, and sincere. If the other person seems defensive, acknowledge their emotions and offer to discuss them further. This reinforces your intention to help, rather than just criticize.
3. Create an opportunity for growth: Remember that the goal of feedback is to create an environment where it’s seen as an opportunity for growth and improvement. By handling each situation with care and understanding, you can help alleviate feelings of shame or blame and foster a more open and productive dialogue.
4. Manage your own emotions: Remember that you can’t control the other person’s emotions, but you can manage how you show up and react to their emotions. Be willing to be present with their emotional response, whether it’s sadness, anger, or defensiveness.

The Importance of Self-Awareness

In gauging feedback, self-awareness is key. It’s essential to be aware of your own communication style and how it might be perceived by others. It’s also crucial to be able to manage your own emotions, especially when faced with an emotional response from the feedback recipient.

Mastering the art of gauging feedback takes practice and patience. But by being mindful of the recipient’s reactions and adjusting your communication style accordingly, you can ensure that your feedback is heard, understood, and ultimately leads to positive change.

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Originally published at https://www.linkedin.com.